Hey Cox…

26 Jan

This was written over a year ago (by your’s truly) and never published.  Nothing has changed since, so I am going to make it public.

While I single out Cox, as they are my current television and internet provider, this message goes out equally to any, and all, television providers.

Hey Cox…  you have 6 months to provide me with a new DVR box, or I build my own media center PC, and strip you down to a simple CableCard provider. (shopping for one now)

That’s right, no more $18.50 a month fee for your horrible ‘Digital Cable DVR’ box that was provided to me in the year 2005.  You, Cox, in all your pun-filled-name glory, need to wake up, smell the coffee, and pound it like an ‘Irish Car Bomb’ that is about to curdle.  Your shit is old, and it’s beyond obsolete.  Yes, you “redesigned” your interface this past spring, but it still displays in 4:3 ratio SD quality, and looks like it was designed in the early 90’s! (Even if it had been something nice to look at, it’s still lipstick on a pig)  And don’t think this means you have me as a CableCard subscriber for very long either.  As soon as Google, Apple, or someone else breaks the ankles of the television networks, and provides what I describe below, you’re getting stripped down to nothing more than a bandwidth provider.

Google launched ‘Google TV’ last year (2 years ago), in partnership with Dish Network, and while they haven’t had the best start, it’s about to explode.  Yes, Google TV will be something to talk about in 2013.  Mark my word on that.  So go ahead, partner up, and give me a Google TV box, that plays nice with your silly service.  No? No subscription fees for you! (See: no soup for you!)

How about the rumors of the “Cox Plus Package” box, with a modern interface, that wasn’t designed in 1992?  What happened to that?!  Was this hard??  Oh, poor Cox, can’t figure out the future of media!  Let me give you a hint:  The way you run things now, is extinct in the future!  Just wait until Apple gets the TV networks to bend over to the Jobsian ideals of $X per channel, ala carte!  Evil, right!?  “Ala Carte Channels”?!?!  Who does Stevie Jobs think he is?!  The 2nd coming?!  Well… close.  People (in all walks of life) sure seem to listen to him like he is.  You think Hulu is evil? Wait until Stevie Jobs (rest in peace), and his minions, figure out a way to make the Hulu revenue stream look like regular programming.  Just look at what they did to the music industry.

You, Cox, need to provide your users with a compelling, new, MODERN, way to access television, or you’re done in television.  You’ll be stuck, providing nothing more than the internet bandwidth for users to access [Apple/Google/Amazon/Vizio]’s Ala Carte Television Emporium…  and being assholes, creating convoluted tiered pricing structures, to squeeze every last penny out of the consumer, when you could have just updated your LONG AGO AGED television service, and pleased your customers enough to stick with you for a little while longer.  It is inevitable that Apple, Google, Amazon, and other forward thinking technology companies, WILL bring an end to your ancient ‘packaged channel subscription plans’.  The question is, will you, Cox, be ready… or will you be caught standing still, with your old Cox in your hand…?

One Response to “Hey Cox…”

  1. Dave 29 January 2013 at 11:31 pm #


    We just went to a media card setup with HTPC and Windows Media Center exchanging the $38.00 monthly rental for a single 2$/mo media card. So far I’m in love with the picture and the interactivity of having ALL MY NEEDS (video entertainment) met by a single box. Add to that our frustration with having to replace no less than 3 Cox DVR’s within the last 12 months, losing our recorded programing each time. If I could reasonably drop Cox I would…maybe next go around. My wife’s friends all have. They just watch/rent/stream video online through the services mentioned above.

    Now, why doesn’t Cox San Diego provide a 2 way media card experience? Other Cox providers do accross the US, not San Diego nor AZ i’ve heard. Why? From what I’ve read in the legal briefs Cox represents that, “There is no significant demand for 2 way cable card services”. LAF… nobody has sued them yet out here and they don’t feel the need to comply with the 1996 telecom act either. Must be nice. And providing those crappy DVRs. We got 2 DOA boxes 6 months ago before we finally called in a truck. Not 3 weeks ago we got another DOA out of the Cox retail store before calling in a truck. What crappy, refurb, overheated boxes. And the newer box they went with has, count them, TWO tuners. LOL. It’s 2013 Cox, 2 tuners isn’t going to cut it. Satelite providers are giving FIVE tuners now.

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